Our photos of Amelia arrived last week. Of course I cried as I slowly took in each one. Kind of wishing we were holding her again, but glad we're no longer in that intense experience and place of pain. As much as I know I'll enjoy making Amelia's scrapbook, I can't bring myself to start on it yet. I'll know the right time. I've already got a scrapbook. It is pure white and has a gorgeous cover. The perfect memory capsule. I'm thinking of placing all the cards we received soon after her death in there as well. I got it inexpensive at Target on the clearance rack. I think it was off-season or something. I've also bought different stickers and other decor to surround her photos. I want to title the scrapbook. I kind of like "The Days of Amelia", but really don't know. If this sounds morbid to you, my apologies. In my eyes, I am cherishing the small excitements I have to celebrate her memory.
Other news: I am slowly getting that weight off! I had gained an extra 15 lbs of "baby fat" that just wouldn't quit. I am down to only 8 lbs of that. I continue to drag myself to the gym, count my calories, and drink non-fat mochas. Maybe if I rid myself of the "mocha" part, it'd be even better! My most recent friends have been hummus with wheat thins, yogurt, string cheese, any fruit, tuna, turkey slices, granola bars and whole wheat sour dough bread. Yes, they sell ww sour dough bread at Costco and it is scrumptious! I have avoided desserts like the plague. The only real desserts I've had lately are some pecan cookies from Trader Joe's, those milk chocolate topped shortbread cookies that are only 130 calories for two, and Brilla's ABC crackers from Trader Joe's. Those last ones are surprisingly delicious for being low-cal! I also love whole wheat stuff (even pasta) and corn tortillas. I have shied away from creams (sour cream) and cheese. I drink only water, except when I have hot tea and coffee. This is really strange, but I have given up caffeine for the most part. It's not that I think I'll die. It's mainly because I'm in that having-kids-stage-of-life and don't want to go back and forth, back and forth between pregnancy and breastfeeding. It's much easier to just cut all out. I've never really needed caffeince for high energy anyway!! I'm quite buoyant on my own!
I continue to get rid of junk (or stuff I don't need) in my home. In fact, I should be cleaning out my linens closet right now. I'll tell you ALL that is in there: dining, kitchen and bathroom linens, containers of toiletries, curlers, vases, nice dishes that don't fit anywhere else, all things candles, and picture frames. I have enough candles to light up our home during 5 years of snow storms. That's exaggerating a bit, but you get my drift. My mission with this closet is not to throw items out, but to make everything accessible. Because "if you can't see it, you won't use it". This will include buying new containers.
My husband really likes this organization whirwind I'm on. He's the one from whom it originated in the first place. I said,"I'd love to take an organization class or something, to learn from a professional". He said,"Why don't you just get books written by experts at the library and teach yourself?" So that's what I've been doing. And I've seriously thought about becoming a professional home and office organizer. I honestly have a blast. I'll post pics once I'm all done.
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