Friday post

We were eating our cereal the other day. Brilla looks up and says, "I forgot to mention that I want you to sit by me, Mama." Forgot to mention. Where in the world did this proper English come from?

As I was teaching this week, Brilla was in the other room quietly playing...until she obviously had successfully gone potty. She announced triumphantly from the bathroom, "I went pee-pee Mama! I get an ABC cookie!" Of course, while I was disconcerted, my guests had their chuckle.

Brilla is at such a fun stage right now. She makes me laugh (and makes me frustrated), and has been giving me lots of love lately. She's at a funky clothing phase, too. While she's migrating into 3Ts, some of the 2Ts still fit. So I have the 3Ts out, but can't put away the 2s! It makes for a lot of clothing in her drawers (which I'm grateful for). And I know spring is coming soon, but doggonit, winter just won't leave. I know as soon as I store away the spring stuff, nice days will be popping their heads out.

FYI, what are your favorite children's clothing stores? I am obsessed with them, though I've had to keep my purchases to a minimum.
Here are my faves:

• Old Navy
• Crazy 8
• Gap
• Garage sales!
• Thrift stores!
• Target (clearance rack!)

Yes, I am a bargain-girl. But I love stylish and classy stuff, too. I'm picky. And I have a girl! What a terrible combo! ;D I can't wait until spring and summer roll around for the ever-inexpensive garage sales. We have a thrift store right by my house (Meeker Street Emporium) that I love going to because the prices are even cheaper than Goodwill. Plus, proceeds go toward the Union Gospel Mission. At our outlet mall, I am cheaper still as I head straight to the clearance racks their, too!

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I am a dreamer at night. Don't know if my brain has found a lifelong hobby, but honestly. Almost every night I have a crazy or vivid dream. Like last night I dreamt my mom was at the doctor's office and they found a baseball in her stomach. We were all like, "How'd she swallow that one?!"

On a serious note, right after Amelia's death, I longed to have a dream about her. I wanted to see her face in my sleep, I wanted to know what she looked like in heaven. To hear her "voice", too. I wanted to dream of her up in heaven dancing on the streets of gold before God's throne. Just something to glimpse her, even if it wasn't real. I've longed to imagine me rejoining her in heaven, holding hands, and tears streaming down our faces. Even if it's just a figment of my mind's imagination...or maybe a gift from God.

I even prayed about it, not lately, but I did ask for it once. God knows my heart, not everything we pray for comes true. I have pure motives, though. It's not like I want a BMW, or a castle in Ireland. Just to dream of Amelia.

It does surprise me. All the trauma and emotion tied to her death, or life I should say, hasn't sparked one single vision in this mind...this mind that conjures up a million other crazy scenarios.
Maybe it's because I didn't actually know Amelia. I didn't ever hear her voice, hold her body continually in my arms, never felt her eyes looking into mine. Often we dream about those things we see every day, events that occur not so long ago. They all tend to swirl together in one hazy cloud at some point.

This thought process may sound incredibly silly to you. But it is something I ponder from time to time, "Why haven't I ever dreamt of Amelia?"

I'll let you know if I do.